Tuesday, March 18, 2008


There's an empty billboard in South Boston, by the South Bay Center that someone has spray painted. The message reads, "War Is An Unnatural Disaster."

Today, I feel like an unnatural disaster. A huge shakeup has turned my entire world upside down, and I'm still trying to figure out how I will get back on to steady ground. I thought nothing worse could happen than the mess that began in November, and well, never say never, because worse is happening.

If I look at the glass half-full, I can remind myself that I have (most of) my health, a good husband, and friends to turn to for support. If I look at the glass half-empty... sometimes the best looking option is to jump in front of a subway train.

How did I get myself into this? I'm beginning to think I'm seriously naive and a bad judge of character. I'm walking through a dense fog, or some parallel existence where I can see the normal world, but I can't bring myself to say I'm a part of it.

3 responses:

Constance Squared said...

I'm sorry to hear that things are not going well. Can't be sure if this is work related for you, but I can sympathize. I went through something similar where I made three bad job choices in a row. Well, I take that back, two bad job choices, then a good job choice that turned bad when my boss was replaced with a truly repugnant human being. Made me feel like I needed to be bringing someone along with me on interviews and such because obviously I was missing some signs somewhere.

I hope you get it figured out very soon. Thinking of you.

Unknown said...

Kate - I'm sorry to hear your news. I wish you all the best friends, and the love and support you can possibly need to weather through whatever you're facing.

I also want to thank you for taking the time to care about me, someone who have never met in your life. I feel as though your kindness towards me is a testament to the good karma you put into the world.

All the best...

Vanessa said...

You're amazing, so you'll bounce back! I believe it! Don't jump in front of the train!

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